New Year's Resolutions: Aim Low & It's All Upside

As 2015 rolls around, you see a lot (read: a sh!tload) of year-in-review lists and, of course, those ubiquitous tips on how to form resolutions you might actually be able to keep.

Last night I read an informative article, written by New York Times bestselling author Gretchen Rubin on setting your intentions for the new year as effectively as possible. While she had a lot of insightful suggestions, such as embrace positive aims rather than negative ones (choose DO rather than DON'T), this year I can sum up my resolutions in a single phrase: Set the bar low.

In days of yore, I'd aspire to greatness and then immediately dismiss my hifalutin list well before Valentine's Day when it seemed I was unable to master Mandarin while needlepointing Shakespearean sonnets. Well, that all changes now!

Resolutions of Years Past

• Write a novel
• Become a yoga instructor
• Learn French on audio while driving to and from poetry readings
• Cook new recipes weekly
• Save for a once-in-a-lifetime vacation to Greece
• Perform Heimlich maneuver on one choking victim per month

OK, so you see my dilemma?

Resolutions for 2015

• Get out of pajamas before lunch
• Wear a bra more -- not so much because I need one as because it seems like the right thing to do
• Try new cheeses
• Combat husband's narcolepsy/amnesia/lethargy by spiking his cereal with Red Bull
• Try not to end up in foreclosure
• Stop using sugar and flavored creamer in my coffee
• Close door when using bathroom
• Stop heckling telemarketers
• Convince children dust bunnies are the only pets we can afford
• Resist temptation to allow F-word to become personal mantra

These goals seem decidedly more attainable. Yes, it's basically a glorified to-do list but if I can achieve these then Ha! first year to ever keep all my resolutions and that, my friends, is something!

Did you make any resolutions for 2015? Happy New Year!